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LAWmazing 7

A Probation Officer's Discretion

In US v Spink, the accused Douglas Spink owned websites that promoted and contained zoophilia, bestiality and other similar materials that promoted sexual act with animals. It attracted the attention of law enforcement officers leading to a conviction and a sentencing hearing before the Court.

Judges do what judges do sometimes in sentencing minimizing, one can only suppose, the inconvenience on a convicted person, of restrictions upon his/her liberties. But, presumably, things do sometimes slip through the cracks and something LAWmazing™ results.

"The defendant shall not possess or peruse any authentic, altered, or manufactured, in whatever form, material that depicts and/or describes bestiality, zoophilia or any sexual conduct involving animals except as approved in advance by his probation officer."

Acquittal By Breasts

Serena KozakuraSome lewd lawyers go their entire careers waiting for this moment.

Busty Japanese bikini model who goes by the trade name of Serena Kozakura, was initially convicted in a Japanese court for wanton property destruction. Her ex-boyfriend's evidence was that she had kicked a hole in his door suspecting him to be with another women - and then crawled through.

The first court convicted her but the attention of the appeal court was drawn to her, err, her breasts.

Appeal court judge Kunio Harada heard her appeal in March of 2008 in his Tokyo courtroom. After a rather long and awkward gaze at Ms Kozakura, he agreed with her defence lawyer's assertion that the conviction was obviously a miscarriage of justice: given his client's chest size, she could not of fit through the hole in the door. Ms Kozakura was acquitted and she credited her breasts for saving the day.

The Dog Shogun

Japanese military leaders, circa 1685, samurai all, were called Shoguns. When Shogun Tokugawa Tsunayoshi (1646-17090) lost his only son, he called a Buddhist priest, Ryuko for advice. Well, of course, said Ryuko, the curse was due to his previous life in which, Ryuko explained, the shogun was an animal. To atone for that, the shogun had to show mercy to dogs. In the best example we can find of leaving law in the hands of a single man, Tsunayoshi had two huge temples built to worship ... dogs. Then he got his court lawyers to issue new laws, Edicts on Compassion for Living Things. Killing dogs was prohibited for which the penalty was capital punishment. They had to die of natural causes only. A census of dogs was taken. A huge home for homeless dogs was built in Yedo and a dog tax imposed to pay for the housing of the dogs.

And ... anyone coming across a stray dog had to feed it.Needless to say, dogs multiplied in Japan and caused all kinds of trouble with crop and livestock. Unfortunately, Tsunayoshi really wanted to rid himself of the curse so he strictly enforced the dog laws. Still, no son so Tsunayoshi threw birds and fish into the mix. The crows and other birds had a field day with crops and little food could come from the oceans either. One man was killed for murdering a fish. None of this helped the reputation of the samurai among the Japanese people. Small pox took Tsunayoshi’s life in 1709 and his successor, Ienobu, immediately repealed the animal laws.