Funny Legal Headlines

Of course newspapers make mistakes. They're human just like us after all.

But when newspapers make mistakes, the result is splashed on their front page for the whole world to see - and often thereafter immortalized on the Internet.

The most apparent of errors is that headline that leaves you scratching your head and that speaks to a very tired headline writer, late one night with little or no creative juices left and who lets an errant double entendre, accidental pun or just plain funny headline because of the story it presents -  get out there.

Here are real headlines that spoke to legal issues as they were presented to an unsuspecting and incredulous public in their morning papers:

• Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

• Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

• Miners Refuse to Work after Death

• Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

• War Dims Hope for Peace

• Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop, Find Weapons

• Statistics Show That Teen Pregnancy Drops Off Significantly After Age 25

• If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

• Marijuana Issue Sent to a Joint Committee (Toronto Star, June 14, 1996)

• Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

• Homicide Victims Rarely Talk to Police (Express-Times, February 2004)

• City Unsure Why The Sewer Smells

• Man Shot Twice in Head, Gets Mad

• One-Armed Man Applauds the Kindness of Strangers

• Blind Man Denied Minnesota Gun Permit

• State Prison To Replace Easy-Lpen Locks

• Volunteers Needed to Help Torture Survivors

• City Council Runs Out of Time to Discuss Shorter Meetings

• Schools Will Have to Improve Dropout Rates (Canandaigua Daily Messenger, October 2008)

• Man Robs Then Kills Himself

• Police Eye DNA Sample From Butt

• Woman in Sumo Wrestler Suit Assaulted Her Ex-Girlfriend in Gay Pub After She Waved at Man Dressed as a Snickers Bar

• Midget Sues Grocer, Cites Belittling Remarks

• Mayor Says D.C. is Safe Except for Murders

• Man Shoots Neighbor With Machete

• Multiple Personality Rapist Sentenced to Two Life Terms

• Man Found Dead in Cemetery

• Bar Trying to Help Alcoholic Lawyers

• Two Convicts Evade Noose, Jury Hung

• Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

• Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

• Teacher Strikes Idle Kids

REFERENCES:

• PlainLanguage.gov [http://www.plainlanguage.gov/examples/humor/headlines.cfm]